en-crypted:

you can always tell who has the most social confidence by who blows their nose in class 

153,392 notes

alt-j:

do any millionaires follow me that are bored

154,093 notes

Ela era um texto que ninguém queria ler até o fim.
Ariel S.    (via derrotador)

66,972 notes

stoutshady:

emmetbrickowskivevo:

stoutshady:

once i accidentally called 999 and my brother was shouting “im gonna kill you” at his video game in the background and to cut a long story short 20 minutes later 2 police officers showed up at my house to check out a potential murder and this is why i hate my life

I think it’s 911…

i think i live in england…

30,822 notes

these-fading-scars:

What if when we randomly start crying its because our soulmate got hurt or is really upset?

2,363 notes

dammitmishaa:

So my friend came into school one day wearing a dress that had straps and the vice principal came up to her and said “You need to either change or cover your shoulders up because it’ll distract the boys” to which she replied “Well I find boys faces distracting, do they have to cover them up?” and the vice principal said “Maybe you should focus in class more.”

If that doesn’t tell you that things are messed up, then I don’t know what does. 

21,805 notes

minxiekitten:

raubbenhood:

Disneyworld needs to make a rollercoaster based off of the ride Yzma and Kronk take to the lair. When the ride starts, Yzma’s voice yells “pull the lever, Kronk!” and the ride starts to move backwards so she yells “wrong lever!” and it shoots you forward.

WHY IS THIS NOT HAPPENING?!

103,766 notes

Apparently it’s a thing to crochet sweaters for turtles

kyos-cock:

So I accidentally discovered this picture while i was looking for cute things to crochet and THERE ARE ENTIRE BLOGS DEDICATED TO TURTLE COZIES.

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THEY LOOK SO CUTE THEY HAVE NORMAL ONES

THEY HAVE ONES THAT LOOK LIKE FUCKING BOWSER

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THEY HAVE ONES SHAPED LIKE ANIMALSimage

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THEY HAVE ENTIRE BLOGS DEDICATED TO MAKING YOUR TURTLES LOOK LIKE FOOD

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image

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THE PUMPKIN IS SO CUTE BUT THIS GEM IS MY PERSONAL FAVORITE:

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BUT HOW DO YOU CHOOSE A FAVORITE WHEN THEY’RE ALL SO CUTE

image

37,726 notes

No matter how much I feel, I’m not going to let it out. If I have to cry, I’m gonna cry on the inside. If I have to bleed, I’ll bruise. If my heart starts going crazy, I’m not gonna tell everyone in the world about it. It doesn’t help anything. It just makes everyone’s life worse.
Jonathan Safran Foer, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close (via durianquotes)

(Source: durianseeds)

6,837 notes

If tomorrow, women woke up and decided they really liked their bodies, just think how many industries would go out of business.

283,445 notes

nogitsune-banshee:

charliemcdonnell:

the amount of hair i lose in the shower really concerns me

what concerns me more is how I still have hair

222,546 notes